Practicing Awareness of Microaggressions

I am sure I have made some microaggressions before because I do not think before I speak and I am a pretty outspoken person. For example, my friend JD, who lives in Black Mountain, N.C., is extremely racist though he does not believe he is. He makes more blatant racist comments then comments of microagression. When I was visiting him he made comments like: ‘they may be dressed nice but they are still lying and stealing niggers’, ‘I think tattoos are acceptable on men, but women are meant to be untouched’, ‘I cannot believe she has never stolen from work’ (about his African-American co-worker), and ‘I would never condone cheating but why did she cheat with a black man.’  I am sure he made other comments that were more microaggessions then racist but these were the ones that stuck out in my head. I was not comfortable around him fully when he made discriminating comments and I was worried that others would assume that I felt the same way. He does not see anything wrong with his comments and does not feel bad about them. To him they are the truth, facts. These acts of microaggression happened in different settings. Some times JD and I were out to eat or just talking in general. 

I was only able to do a little observation of others and myself this week. I was not out in the public much and when at work there are only 2 others employees and the clients are all children. All the family and friends I came into contact this week did not make any prejudice comments.

Perspectives on Diversity and Culture

We all grow up in different family dynamics, towns, schools, religions and cultures. We learn and gain so many different concepts and values from each experience. We take so much in from each interaction and experience that each moment shapes and changes who we are.

I asked several friends their definition of culture and diversity and the three that responded in time gave the following answers:

JD was born and raised in a small rural country town in N.C. said "Culture is the behaviors and beliefs that a social or ethnic group stereotypically posses. Funny how if u talk about a bad thing then your a racist. But if u ignore the bad behaviors and only pay attention to positive attributes your a scholar."  And diversity is "The difference between all of these groups and possibly within the same group. The study of the differences if you will."

Lori who lives in NYC but was born in Paraguay said "culture is made up of your upbringing and i guess where you were brought up, like location wise city vs burbs ... and who has kinda been an influence in your life. i kinda think that everyone has their own culture almost like their own personality, identity" and diversity is "the world i guess...no one person is the same...everyone is different therefore everyone is diverse."

Rj was born in California but has lived in Maryland for the last 15 years, said "Culture is the habits and traditions created and followed by a group of humans" and diversity is the "Differences in beliefs and culture."

The answers that my friends gave were quite interesting and similar. They all inadvertently stated that ones culture creates their social identity. Lori feels that each of our cultures is interrelated with our personality. JD has had limited amounts of exposure to other cultures and is uneducated in diversity and how it plays a role in our world in this day in age. Lori has grow up with a lot of exposure to other cultures and has even been seen as a minority. Rj has grown up with a moderate amount of exposure to different cultures and has a good understanding and acceptance of others. Lori moved to the States around the age of 3 months, she was adopted by a single white female. Lori looks nothing like her mother and has been mistaken as  'Spanish' several times in her life. She knows what it is like to be an immigrant from another country and not the majority. Since we are all different and come from vastly diverse upbringings, for a variety of reasons, our ideas towards culture and diversity are going to be dissimilar yet congruent. My thinking has not changed much on what I define culture and diversity to be, I agree with all three of my friends definitions but also feel like family plays a bigger role within ones culture and society plays a bigger role in regards to diversity.

My Family Culture

My family does not really have a family culture, we are more a part of the dominant culture. We 'follow the American' way. Our heritage is not really prominent or practiced in my family. My items to me are not very culture like. I do not feel like my family really has any items that are related to our culture. My three items that I would bring are my family's coat of arms, my MacBook Pro and photos of my family through the generations. 

My family's coat of arms is a piece of my family's history. It shows where I came from and who i am. It is proof of my family. It links me to my ancestors.

 

My MacBook is the most important material item to me. They link me to our current society and dominant culture. They hold all my most important documents like my birth certificate and S.S. and items that mean the most to me. Having my MacBook is a way to still connect me to all my loved ones in other places.

 

My old photos of generations past are a record of where I came from and who I am. It shows me and my future children their past family.

 I would be slightly upset if I was told I could only keep one item. All of these items are a part of me and are very important to me. Having my physical coat of arms and the old photos is more symbolic the having a copy of them but if I could only keep one I would keep my MacBook because it has a copy of everything and connects me to my ancestors as well as my current family and the world around me. 

We all view cultures differently and I never really saw myself abiding to a culture or linked to one.